Rants from the Crib

An Ob/Gyn gone mad

Road Construction

Our little town has been plagued with road construction since the day I moved here. It has continued for the past ten years. I hate road construction. I hate everything about it. As near as I can tell, they tear up the damn road for a year or so, and it looks exactly the same when they are done with it. And then they resume the process and tear it right back up again.

They put road construction CONES for miles whether or not they are doing anything there. And they put up road construction SIGNS whether or not they are doing anything. Then they cut the speed limit in half and put up big signs that say, “SPEEDING FINES DOUBLED WHEN WORKERS ARE PRESENT.” Then they charge you the doubled fine on Sunday. At midnight. In the snow. And there is not a freaking worker present ANYWHERE. But even if you take a picture to document this, they throw it out of court and charge the doubled fine anyway. Can you say, Speed Trap?

Lately they have resumed road construction for the entire length of one of the two main roads that runs through town. Surely they can’t work on the whole thing at once. They have blocked off turn lanes and made it near impossible to navigate. There are CONES everywhere. And tall blinky pointed signs. And then they have torn the whole median off the road, through the whole length of town. I have yet to see them do anything else except in one tiny spot at one end of town where they are tearing up the bridge. And I’m really not sure what they think they’re going to do with it.

It is ridiculous that they have this much road construction because this is a small little town. I haven’t seen any evidence that we are overflowing the roads we currently have, except maybe at Christmas time, on the side of town where the mall is. And the concentration of cars are going to the mall anyway. They don’t need any parking spaces at the mall, because except at Christmas, it is totally empty. It is a ghost mall. All the major department stores are gone, except for Sears, and a JC Penney outlet, and this place called Belk that has no recognizable brand names and sells clothes for little old ladies.

And now they are tearing up the OTHER main road that runs through town. Really? And that’s going to help traffic circulation how? And again, they’ve done weird things with the turn lanes, and at night I can barely find my way home. They have also put these weird little neon green hump things in the middle of all the medians. I don’t have a clue what they might be. Their presence annoys me because I don’t know what the hell they are.

So as near as I can tell, there is no visible construction going on, except over one bridge. And they have this crane thing there that has a little cart with two wheels dangling off of it. And the cart is way up in the air and it has been hanging there for weeks. I don’t know what the purpose of the dangling cart is, but they sure are expending a lot of energy to keep it dangling in the air. I think somebody put it there and forgot about it.

So we are under siege. The CONSTRUCTION is here to stay. I am thankful for one thing. In one month, I will not have to drive along that torn up road anymore. I am going to North Dakota to work a couple weeks out of every month. And I’ll bet you anything I’ll drive into town from the airport and the first thing I will see under all that snow is “UNDER CONSTRUCTION.” And there will be no workers present in the twenty feet of snow. And they will still give me a freaking ticket when I drive through town.

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